In Defense of Fluffy Wiping

Recently, the Washington Post reported that environmentalists have taken up a new cause. It seems fluffy toilet paper is the latest threat to the planet. And, of course, it is we spoiled Americans who are to blame.

Apparently our bottoms are too tender for the scratchy, single-ply toilet papers and various plant leaves used by the rest of the world. We’re devastating old growth forests all in the name of tushy comfort. Its obscene!

A while back it was reported that singer, Sheryl Crow was suggesting that we only use a single sheet of toilet paper per movement. She too was concerned about the disastrous possibility of our wiping habits wiping out the forests.

It is one thing to conserve energy and recycle bottles. I might even be convinced to trade in my gas guzzling, environment destroying, carbon footprint expanding SUV. But when you go after my butt, you’ve gone too far. I don’t know what Sheryl Crow and her ilk are eating, but I’ve never had a trip to the bathroom where one sheet would suffice. Ever…

So if the forests disappear, so be it. Long live Quilted Norther Ultra Plush!

Let the little children…

I was in Colorado Springs the other day for some meetings with the amazing folks at Compassion International. As I waited in the lobby, I noticed a group of children who were waiting for a tour, ably led by my friend McNair Wilson.

As the children waited, they started climbing on the bronze statue of Jesus. Its a proper statue of Jesus (although I think he looks a little Irish). He’s holding a child in one arm and reaching out to some other children who are spaced out appropriately in the immediate vicinity. I took this picture.

I’m pretty sure that what Jesus really said was, “Let the little children climb on my head.”

What would you say?

Anne Jackson, the author of the book Mad Church Disease posted a question on her blog that got an amazing number of responses. The question is, “What is something you feel you can’t say in church, or around other Christians?”

The responses from her readers were heartbreaking, depressing, sarcastic, angry; almost none were encouraging. Wow! If her readers are at all representative of the church-going public in America (and I don’t know that they are, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they are), then apparently, I’m not alone in feeling that I’ve never quite fit in. Some of the saddest were from Pastors or people in full-time “ministry.”

Shouldn’t it be safe to say anything? Shouldn’t the body of Christ be able to embrace any question, respond to any doubt? Shouldn’t church be a place where we can express our deepest fears and struggles without being added immediately to the prayer chain?

Here are just a few of the ones I wrestle with: Why do we go to church anyway? Does God really want me to tithe so the church can get a new (insert item)? Why can’t women be pastors or elders? What is the point of prayer really? Has anyone ever actually witnessed the church loving the sinner but hating the sin?

If it was totally safe, what would you say?

Fuzzy Bunnies

Yesterday on a flight to Nashville I sat near a woman dressed in an expensive business suit. She looked like she was in her late 30’s or early 40’s. Her hair and makeup were immaculate. She had an expensive looking laptop case and some sort of important looking stack of memos on her tray table with highlighters at the ready.

When I noticed her, she had nodded off for a fitful airplane nap, which is not unusual. What was unusual was that she was clutching a stuffed, fuzzy bunny to her chin like a small child. I have seen a lot of things on airplanes over the years, but I have never seen a grown woman asleep with her fuzzy bunny. I was tempted to take a picture with my iPhone but I didn’t. But I started thinking about what kind of comfort she was getting. What was that fuzzy bunny doing for her and what is my fuzzy bunny?

What is it that I use for comfort, or to deal with stress, or to calm my fears? I have to admit that I have a number of fuzzy bunnies, some harmless, some possibly not so harmless. I won’t name them here, but I imagine you may be thinking of some of your own. It occurs to me that to the extent I substitute fuzzy bunnies for real relationship and reliance on Jesus, there is a problem.

What’s Your Hope In?

If you drive, you’ve been seeing these stickers all over the place. I wonder if Obama supporters are still hopeful, but that’s for another time.

What struck me is that I don’t hope in Obama. Neither did I hope in George Bush (even though I was a Bush supporter). I don’t hope in government at all, be it local, state or federal. I do hope the government won’t totally screw things up but I’m not holding my breath. In fact I expect things to get a lot worse before they ultimately get better.

Hope is a word that has many nuances. Webster gives one definition of the verb hope which is, “To expect with confidence.” This kind of hope comes from some experience that has built trust in the person doing the hoping. It is not some pie in the sky fantasy. The person of hope has a confident expectation that the one who is the object of their hope will come through because they have delivered in the past.

Here’s a suggestion. Hope in this: 

Therefore, preparing  your minds for action,  and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. 1 Pet 1:13

Four Days That Make A Huge Difference

I just finished four days in Asheville, NC at the Cove with a group of Pastors (and others) from all over the country. There were Baptists and Presbyterians, non-demoninational folks and others representing a wide swath of Christianity in North America. They were young and older, experienced and inexperienced men and women with one thing in common. They came to the Dynamic Communicators Workshop to get better at communicating the greatest message on the face of the earth. It was a great time!

I went to the Dynamic Communicators Workshop as a student back in 1985 and I can honestly say it changed my ministry and my life. Not only did I become a better speaker, but I became a better writer, program planner and thinker. The SCORRE method that is taught gave me the tools I needed to communicate with crystal clear focus. Haddon Robinson teaches the importance of the “Big idea.” The Dynamic Communicators Workshop gives you the tools to actually get there.

I’ve been a part of the DCW staff now for the last 17 years. The workshop has changed and improved in many ways over that time, but one thing has remained consistent; the remarkable improvement experienced by the students. It is simple. If you want to be the best communicator you can be, attend a Dynamic Communicators Workshop!

Find out more at www.DynamicCommunicators.com.

Swine Flu Origins

A friend sent me this the other day. I laughed out loud. Forget washing your hands and carrying Purel around everywhere.

Consummate Customer Service

One of my favorite places to eat lunch is Chick-fil-A. Their original chicken sandwich is really good and, if you get it with no butter, it is only 8 points (that’s Weight Watchers lingo for the uninitiated).

But as much as I love a Chick-fil-A chicken sandwich, I love their customer service even more. I would put Chick-fil-A at the top of the food chain for food chains. They are universally polite and friendly, they get your order right, and they always say thank you. Great food and great service make for a welcome experience in the otherwise disappointing world of fast food!

Sometimes, they even give you a free brownie. I don’t know how many Weight Watcher points that is.

God Bless America

Today I found myself sitting at a light behind a car plastered with liberal foolishness which I’m sure the driver considered the height of wisdom. I actually don’t mind the political point of view stickers, but this 0ne annoyed me.

God Bless the Whole World – No Exceptions. What a load of crap.

Do these people really think that by asking God to Bless America, we’re leaving out the rest of the world? Or could it be that they really don’t want God to bless America at all? Or more likely, they don’t really believe in a God that blesses and are just taking a mean spirited jab at people of faith.

God indeed has blessed America. And God also blesses the whole world. Part of the way He blesses the whole world is through America. I’m not blind to our country’s short comings, but as Dennis Prager says, “Every country does bad things, the question is how much good does a country do?” The United States continues to be at the top of the list.

God Bless America – No Exceptions!

Their Worst Nightmare

The Colorado legislature is on track to make Colorado the latest state to ban the use of hand held cell phones while driving. (See the story here) The vote was reportedly on a party line basis with three Democrats voting yes and two Republicans voting no.

I’m against it – the new law that is. I do wish people would do a better job of driving while they’re talking on a cell phone, or putting on their makeup, or swinging at a disobedient child in the back seat, or reading a book (as I witnessed just a couple days ago). But none of that is as important to me as is keeping the government from “protecting” me from myself.

I ride my Harley without a helmet. I enjoy a good cigar. I ride double on my friends ATV. I eat foods that are bad for me. I enjoy hunting and shooting guns. I play in a band whose volume makes my ears ring. I go boating without wearing a life jacket. I believe in “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness!”

My cell phone is important to me. It is a great tool that allows me to be productive in the car. And I told the talk radio guy that very thing the other day – when I called in on my cell phone, while I was driving down the road, after I went through the drive through, as I was steering with my knee, so I could eat my hamburger and talk and not be late to my appointment.